Grandpa and the bees

Today is a beautiful and sad day for my family and those who are close to us.  A paradox for two reasons. One. we are truly joyous that my grandfather Norman Nauer also known as Adolf Nauer is no longer suffering from physical pains and secondly we are sad at the same time that he will never be physically present with us again.  On Monday, we celebrated a milestone in his life, as he was surrounded by his family and grandchildren to celebrate his 79th birthday. Last night he was taken to the hospital suffering from many different and serious health issues, he went to heaven this morning around 6.30.

My grandfather was a funny soul.  He had the greatest skin and very beautiful grayish/blue eyes, not hazel,not brown, no entirely blue but a mixture of these colours. It was probably the reason why many women fell for the man. He had many girlfriends but my grandmother captured his heart right to his last days. Why is it a little hard to talk about him in the past tense? He was just here last night? As I was woken up by a bizarre dream this morning, I said a small prayer because I knew from looking at him last night, his time to go wasn't too far away. As I said my farewells, while he laid on his hospital bed,with needles, IV,oxygen masks, I kissed him on the cheek,forehead and whispered in his ear:

"Pa, we are all here now, we know you are suffering and you can let go.  Heaven is waiting for you, grandma is there too'.

I felt a sense of peace come over me, I didn't cry, instead I just prayed for his suffering to end.  My grandma, passed away in 1997 and two years after, my grandfather in his deep sadness and grief went though great depression. As a result, he had a major stroke. He then went to live in New Zealand for a few years and was brought back to be with us as his health was deteriorating and we did not want to put him in a nursing home.  When he came back, he no longer talked and he had to be assisted while eating, bathing,standing up and all the other things that we normally do without thinking in our daily lives. I was convinced that he could walk and talk again. He was the biggest rugby fanatic I know and sometimes, he did talk about rugby in the early hours of the morning when I came to check on him.  I told him that he was too funny, pretending that he could not talk, I wonder if because the people who came to see him were not his favourite and he just didn't want to talk to them haha. He would talk about grandma, his rugby days, his Marist days, his girlfriends in New Zealand during the war.  He lived a very colourful life.  He always had a smile on his face and he worked hard.

Out of all the stories I can tell you about him, one makes me laugh each time I reminisce.  When I was around 5, my sisters, mum and I went to visit him at his place.  When we arrived, he had just gotten back from his plantation wearing his lopsided hat, his ie lavalava, his smoke between his teeth and his winking eyes.  He sat us on the bench and started telling stories, all the while yelling at my grandma to fetch us some tea,ice cream and sasalapa, yes all in that order. My grandfather always put on a show for his visitors. He would command grandma around to do this and that but we all knew that she was the boss of him.  Back to the story, he was telling us that bees live in trees and that they were very very smart insects.  They make honey and sweet nectar, we must treat them with respect because they were the key to beautiful flowers.  The most important thing to remember about bees is that they can be caught and they are delicious!  We were all in awe out of nowhere, presented an unmoving bee (lifeless/dead), threw it in his mouth and started chewing!Joanne, Louisa and I looked at each other and with O as mouths just flabbergasted.  Suffice to say that the very next day, Louisa my 4 year old sister at the time, actually ate a bee following pa's bee show! We found out years later that grandpa pretended to throw the bee in his mouth, threw it pass his cheek and just pretended to chew. Lesson learned, bees are important but imitating grandpa's shows not so much, much to mum's horror! I think after that, mum made sure we had spaces between visits.

I didn't write this blog so a thousand people will +1 my blog or that a hundred condolences will swarm my Facebook page. I wrote this in remembrance of him, his never-ending love for the one woman in his life, his dedication to his family,so that young people will remember to respect and love their elders because that is where blessings come from.  We are the legacy that they leave behind  Their stories and characteristics live on through us.  When they no longer remember who you are and are just not there anymore, remember how they carried us as babies, how they saved us from all the potential hidings because we were once mischievous children, how they came to our prize givings in shiny puletasis (my grandma) and bright mismatched red lisp stick and choo susu-ing at the top of their lungs when we get our prizes at school.  Remember to share about them to our own children when so that they will understand who their elders are/were, why they will in the future behave in funny or random ways because let's face it, we do come from some very funny characters. 

Today, we celebrate the life my grandfather lived, simple and fulfilling.  He had many peles (favourites) in the family.  For every new grandchild he held for the first time, he would kiss them at least 10 times, starting from the lips right down to the smooth bottom.  I used to say 'yuk' when he did that, smooth newborn bums are probably more clean than the bleached hospital wards they were born in.  I hope no one wears black during his family service, instead we should have a big party to celebrate his trip home.  For his family service, we should wear different colours to illustrate that he lived a great life, all 79 years of it regardless of the painful years he endured so that he can stay with us a while longer.  Thank you grandpa for teaching us how to love our family including the criminals, the nutcases, the impatient, the deluded and the flower puff Nauers. Above all, thank you for showing us that the world is not so round as the scientists claim, the world is lopsided like the hat you wear and the cheeky smile behind your blue/gray eyes. See you soon.